Relationships are funny old things. There seems to be one blanket that covers them all, rules that every single relationship must adhere to and if you don’t, well, you know where the exits are. Every single couple is different in some way, has their own ways and means of getting along. That said, there are some rules that can never be broken. The universal ones. The ones that, whether you’re one week or six years into it, you just can’t change, bend or break. Here they are;
(Note: If you’re as in love as Jack and Rose, then please, go away. That’s just too much.)
1) Trust Is The Most Important Thing
Without trust, there is no relationship. There’s just paranoia, panic, sleepless nights and a sick feeling in your stomach. You should never give them a reason not to trust you. Mind games, jealousy inducing thought tricks are never going to end successfully. Unless you’re trying to get dumped, in which case, carry on…
2) Respect One Another
Losing respect for one another is the same to driving them to a cliff and fucking them off it, while texting someone else. Respect is a pretty big deal. You know that old saying, treat others as you would like to be treated yourself? Use that saying. Be kind, loving. Don’t be a disrespectful dick. That’s never a good thing.
3) Never Use Sex As A Weapon
Sex is many things. Great, terrible, mind blowing, cringe inducing. What it is not, or at least, should not be, is a weapon. Don’t use it to get what you want from the relationship. Don’t blackmail, bribe or be a sex withholding bitch about it. Yes ladies, I’m looking at you, because we’re far more guilty of doing this. Treat sex as it deserves to be treated. As a regular, healthy, fun thing for the both of you to enjoy.
4) Be Honest
There’s no point in pretending that everything is sunshine, roses and chocolate flavoured raindrops around your other half, when really, you’re calling them the biggest wankstain to ever walk the earth behind their back. Communicate. Talk about why you think that they’re the biggest wankstain to ever walk, but to them. You’re never going to love and adore someone all of the time, hell, I hate myself for roughly six hours a day. Get over it and be forthcoming. All will be ok.
5) Never Take One Another For Granted
It’s pretty easy to fall into a kind of comfort zone where you can’t really remember a time before them. Where everything seems peachy and perfect and you can stop making an effort now. Bullshit. You must never stop making an effort. You wouldn’t work hard to secure an amazing job and then just stop turning up to work, would you? Dress up, brush your hair, make date nights, surprise them. Keep things moving forward.
6) Never Admit That You Fancy Their Friends
This is a dangerous and some might say, downright idiotic move. Yes, it may be more obvious than anything else that their friend is a walking babe magnet. You may have almost sprang to life when you first met them, but please, have a little cop on here and keep it quiet. There’s nothing worse than to see your hot friend (and we all have one) being drooled at by your gormless partner. It’s not just downright fucking rude, it’s hurtful too. Look at your girlfriend or boyfriend like that every once in a while. That’s more like it.
7) Never Make Them Choose Between You And Their Friends
Good god, what is wrong with you? If they’re trying to carve out distance between you and your friends, then it’s time to make a choice. A choice to dump them and make more time for the people who really have your back. If it’s you who’s pulling the strings and trying to, for whatever crazy messed up reason, trying to pull them away and get them all to yourself, then here’s some advice. Stop that, you idiot.
8) Never Stop Appreciating Them
You fell for them. They’re in your life, meaning you must want them to stay there, right? Whether it’s the fact that they spoon you on those cold winter nights, send you stupid pictures of the sandwiches they eat every Thursday or just make you laugh until your belly aches, then appreciate them and make damn sure they know it. Got that?
9) Always Make Time And Effort For One Another
If one of you starts to feel like they’re just not getting a look in, feels like an outsider, an intruder, a drain on the others time and energy, then you may as well pack those bags and get going. Set aside time for the both of you, make an effort and never make them your least important priority. Unless you want to be known as ‘that dickhead’ for the rest of time. Well, do you?